One day the Fermin the tuki, Bora the sand and Surigao the red mountain were drinking. They were talking about their lives and I heard the conversation in my dream.
Bora: Hi Fermin! “Anung balita?” (What’s up?). What the heck happened to your face? Ohhh, is that your gills dude?
Fermin: *crying* Hey Bora, if I say I’m good would you believe me? I can’t see myself on the mirror but my face f*cking hurts. Ohhh.. and I’m hungry too. Got any food Surigao?
Surigao: Sorry Fermin, I don’t. Btw, Bora a lot has changed since we first met. You are “conyotic” and lovely before but now look at you. So kadiri, what’s that slimy green on you. New fashion trend Bora?
Bora: Oh, these… I don’t know. Some locals say that I need this to make sure that my sands stay white. But yes you are correct, I feel dirty. I don’t think people care about me now.
Fermin: I feel you Bora. *cries again*
Surigao: Hey hey hey Fermin. So what really happened on your face?
Fermin: I told you I was hungry so I went near the boats. I was caught with the propellers because I thought it was food.
Bora: WTF Fermin. I thought you should be somewhere else in the Pacific with the rest of your whaleshark friends. What are you doing in Cebu?
Fermin: Yep, you are right. Why would I leave Oslob? I’m a star there. People take photos of me, they thought I’m a hollywood celebrity, they give me food and some of them tap me on my back. Why go to the wild if I enjoy the benefits here?
Surigao: Goodness! You are out of your mind Fermin! Now look at you.
Bora: C’mon Surigao! Don’t be hard on Fermin. It’s not his fault. Those crazy tourists! I thought the Oslob and the Province of Cebu meant good, but I guess they were wrong. They should have listened to the recommendations of the experts.
Fermin: “Like!” Look who’s talking Surigao? Have you seen your head lately? “Shaggy” is soooo 90′s.
Surigao: *checks his hair* What?
Surigao: Stop laughing Bora! It ain’t funny girl.
Bora: You cut your hair and you don’t know about it?
Surigao: No, I didn’t. And please stop giggling. You don’t have a right, look at you, you are dirty. Are you raped?
Bora: I guess so… At least drugs feel good. Sings Afroman’s “Because I get high.” Raped? Molested? At least I’m the number 1 beach in the world. Let’s party party!
Surigao: I feel sorry for you Bora.
Bora: NUMBER 1, NUMBER 1, NUMBER 1 baby. Party pa, cheers!
Fermin: Wait, I have to go. I just have to entertain these boats. See yah later guys. *bangs himself on the boat*
Bora: Surigao, don’t feel sorry for me. There is this thing called “rehab.”
Surigao: Whatever you say.
Bora: Surigao, my friend. Let’s not deny the fact that you also face a problem. Look at you- you lost all your hairs and all I can see is rust. Green became brownish red. What more, you are damaging my marine creature friends below. Before I saw some tarsiers on your mountains. Now, I see truckloads of dirt, trees being cut everywhere.
Surigao: *breaths heavily*
Bora: *holds Surigao’s hand* I feel you brotha. Tagay pa!
Surigao: LGU did this. I thought they meant it for good, for development… I wish my friend, DENR, would do something.
Bora: Amen. Let’s hope for the better. *Falls on her seat because of too much alcohol.*
Surigao: Take care always.
— the end —
Fermin is a “tuki” or whaleshark from Oslob, Cebu.
Bora is a part of Station 1 beach in Boracay.
Surigao is one of the red mountains in Surigao.
In the dream, the conversation was done on a low-tone voice.
Things I will do:
1. Boycott Boracay until they take action on rehabilitation of the island. I will not go to Boracay until they do something about this perennial problem.
2. Boycott Whaleshark Watching/Interaction in Oslob until they find a proper way to do this. I’m really against feeding these wild creatures.
3. Campaign for sustainable tourism in Surigao and actively support ‘no to mining campaigns in Surigao.’
HOW ABOUT YOU?
Note: All photos are not mine, taken from www.google.com